8 January 2026

Journal

‘We switch off the external entertainment so we can start listening to the internal entertainment,’ says Nishta Matarese, who, together with Evangelos Diavolitsis, leads the Unplugged: Disconnect to Reconnect Retreat at Mandali Retreat Center. On the second evening of the retreat, we hand in all our devices and step into silence. A silence that still feels intimidating at this point, yet holds a richness that cannot yet be grasped.

When I chose this specific retreat a few months earlier, it was mainly the idea of being completely away from the world for a while that resonated with me: no emails, no never-ending to-do lists, no sense that everything is pulling at me. As the week drew closer, I started to feel slightly nervous. Wouldn’t I miss my phone? What if something happened? How would I cope with the silence? And my biggest concern: I was flying back on December 19th (the day before the Christmas holidays), through EasyJet’s chaotic Malpensa terminal. Surely all my newfound calm would evaporate in one go.

Between beats

Arriving at Mandali in the mountains of Italy feels like coming up for air. With one deep breath, you literally fill your body with clean mountain air, and because it’s so quiet here, and the views are so panoramic, you take in that spaciousness figuratively as well. You land. Mandali Retreat Center was founded by the former founders of the famous electronic music and festival label ID&T, who came to understand that there is also an entire world to be discovered in the silence between the beats. They first found this in a silent retreat in India, after which they wanted to create such a place in Europe as well.

A quiet village

Mandali is essentially a small village with a hushed energy. The rooms smell deliciously of the wood used in the interiors, the views are, as mentioned, breathtaking (also from the jacuzzi, and from the restaurant terrace), the buffet is healthy yet indulgent, and the grounds are dotted with spiritual landmarks: the yoga shala, a Buddhist labyrinth, a fire pit, and a large Ganesha statue surrounded by a gently flowing stream.

Fall in love with boredom

From the moment we arrive, we’re gently guided in letting go of the urge to grab our phones, through analog activities like walking, charcoal drawing, dancing, and, above all, a lot of writing. And then it’s really time to enter silence. Accompanied by the reassuring yet dry remark: ‘if you fall in love with boredom, you’re already on an advanced spiritual path’. Ok. Let’s see!

Guided inward

Humor is omnipresent among the teachers, who have decades of experience in Tibetan Buddhism, 5Rhythms dance, and who are the founders of the transformational Four Ways to Freedom. Through Dharma Talks and various forms of meditation spread throughout the day, they guide us in turning the energy that is usually directed outward, inward instead. Because you probably recognize this yourself: after a busy day, you no longer feel what you actually need, so you grab your phone for distraction – and suddenly half an hour has passed.

The urge to pick up my phone

I hardly missed my phone, with two exceptions. I always call my boyfriend at the end of a travel day, or at least send a message. Not being able to do that felt a little uncomfortable. But the silliest, and also strangely understandable, craving I had was the constant urge to take a photo whenever I saw something beautiful. That lasted about three days (!) and then I found myself staring at a stunning blanket of clouds, only to realize after five minutes: hey, I haven’t thought about my phone at all.

Average screen time

My average daily screen time used to be around three hours, and much more when traveling. And that didn’t even include TV time, because during breakfast I’d usually watch a series or the news. In the morning, right after my alarm, I’d immediately grab my phone to do the rounds: news sites, Instagram, email, WhatsApp. This retreat truly changed that for me, because I can feel the difference in energy when I spend less time staring at a screen.

Going analog

So now, two weeks after the retreat, I’m at a maximum of 1.5 hours a day (including 20 minutes of meditation, and Instagram for work). I stare out the window while having breakfast – incredibly boring, but suddenly I know my neighborhood, the weather, and the birds much better. Instead of scrolling, I read more, play the occasional game with my boyfriend, and am trying to wrap my head around the basics of origami.

What happens in the silence

And then there’s the silence. At first, it felt heavenly. The calm. But then all sorts of things start bubbling up – and there’s no distraction (reading was discouraged too). During the Dharma Talks, Matarese and Diavolitsis shared Buddhist life lessons that are genuinely useful in moments of fear, frustration, or joy. See thoughts and emotions as soap bubbles that pop up and then disappear again: suffering exists, and everything is temporary.

Meeting fear

Through yoga, I had already come into contact with Buddhist wisdom, but this retreat made me want to learn much more. It truly helped me – both with deeper, personal themes, and with something very concrete: I experience a mild form of claustrophobia. Sometimes on airplanes too. I feel too confined and want to get out, even though I can’t. Sweaty palms, looping thoughts. Now I focus on my breath and recognize that these are just thoughts. I say to myself: oh, I’m scared. That’s allowed. And strangely enough, the feeling often eases quite quickly.

Flowing with struggle

After turning my phone back on, finally speaking to my boyfriend again, breezing through the airport Christmas rush, and being swept back into daily life, it’s now up to me. If you were to look me up in the dictionary under ‘disciplined’ my name would be there. Daily meditation suits me well, as does not automatically picking up my phone. My real challenge lies in surrender: in less planning, less forcing. And that’s where it apparently starts to get interesting, according to Diavolitsis: ‘be ok with flowing with struggle. Because a difficulty can also be an excitement.’ And that’s what I’m going for this year.